Cheese

“That’s for giving us so much homework.” — Random kid

Wind

In a Pzzangg video, he says that he’s not smart.

“You know those kids that have weird ideas, I’m one of those.”

In a room full of smart people, I would stand out only because I have the weirdest ideas.

Consume

Two of my friends, T and C, have deleted Instagram because they feel it is rotting their brains. I agree with this, but why did they not delete it sooner?

Probably because school just started and they realized they don’t have time for social media use. 8 hours of screens will not help

Eat Your

Life changes with a person’s diet.

My dad told me a story about how grandma used to go to the market and pick vegetable leaves off the ground and bring them home because no one wanted them.

My mom and I often complain about how he doesn’t wash vegetables properly, and I don’t know whether it’s because of that story or just plain laziness.

Burgah boy

In Shanghai, I’ve had an unusual urge to eat burgers and other western foods.

I told T about this and the response was that I shouldn’t revert to an American diet because I’m going soon anyway.

However, I don’t think I’ve ever gone 100 days without eating a burger. I suppose it’s become a habit, or just a part of me.

By mass, I’m at least 1% burger.

The Quintupled Gentlemen

The Five Guys on Nanjing Road has seriously insane service. Everyone had English code names and a server named “Charlotte” aggressively offered to bring me ketchup and other condiments.

I did end up running out of ketchup and she brought me another little cup of it. Then, she brought me peanuts (I didn’t know Five Guys had peanuts), which was kind yet offputting; American service is not about service, it’s about putting up with people for a paycheck.

I gave a review where I mentioned Charlotte by name and said that the fries were yummy. I hope she gets a raise but I’m never going back there again.

Ippudo

T did mention many good cuisines I could try, such as Japanese and Thai.

I had a lot of Japanese food in Japan, but I was in the mood for ramen a while ago and went to a place called Ippudo, which happens to be the same name as a place in Manhattan recommended to me by my math teacher Mr. W.

Ippudo might be a chain but it’s definitely not a chain.

Nevermind, I just looked it up, and it is a chain. It tastes way better than the one in Manhattan, and there’s free noodle refills.

There would probably be budget problems with having free refills in America.

Air

pollution levels are measured differently in the U.S. and China because the air quality index (AQI) is different. So, if you open the Weather app, it will show that Shanghai typically has better air than LA, when LA is actually slightly better.

Noise Pollution

I did end up going to busk at Lujiazui and it was just so bad. I don’t think people could even hear me over the sound of traffic and announcements to hold onto the side of the escalator.

• One person stopped to listen for like a minute
• A mother and son asked me how to get to Oriental Pearl Tower
• A family of three asked me where the restroom is

And that’s all that happened.

I thought about just packing up in the middle of my set and going home, but thought it would be embarrassing. But if that wasn’t enough, I realized that nobody would notice if I did that. So, it actually wouldn’t be embarrassing.

So, it was a paradoxically bad performance.

Hard Way

My friend G said that learning happens better when he makes a mistake and he can remember that through the pain.

However, I disagree because there are many situations across different fields where a similar theme of mistakes can be spotted.

For instance, from playing games like chess, you can learn about the idea of overextension, which can then be applied to all other games.

Hospital Guy

Ever since 7th grade, I’ve had pains in my chest with concerns that it may be something wrong with my lungs, like cancer.

It went away after moving to the U.S., but recently, I’ve begun to feel that sensation again due to the smokers in Shanghai.

I only feel the pain when I smell cigarette smoke and sometimes it’s quite sharp. During a checkup, the doctor told me that it’s probably just nerve pain, which sounded redundant because all pain comes from nerves.

E & M

I got a CT scan of my lungs because it’s so cheap in China, and the results were very good. So, I guess I can just never worry about it again.

CT scans do have the equivalent of two years of background radiation, which is non-negligible, but I believe it is worth it for me to not worry about a problem ever again.

CS

A family friend invited me and my dad to play CS. I was a little bit confused because their kids are 12 years old but I said sure.

They asked me, “Have you ever played CS before?” and I said yeah. So, I thought we were going to a PC cafe to play CSGO until they mentioned lasers.

Then, I realized that CS = laser tag. In China, it’s called CS because it’s marketed as Counter Strike in real life.

However, this only got me more interested because I haven’t played laser tag since my friend’s birthday party (V or C?) in 3rd grade.

Adulteration

The place was in the back of a bowling alley and there were basically only kids.

For some reason, the manager put me and my dad and his friend on the same team. Of course, we smoked those kids during the team rounds. However, during FFA, the kids started teaming up and targeting my dad and his friend.

It was amazing to see 5 kids attack them at once… until they turned on me.

After I got turned into swiss cheese, I walked out of the arena and my dad’s friend told me what the conspirators said:

“The adults have given us homework for far too long! Today, we will rise up!”

Misadventures

My friend E and I went for a walk by the river where I did karaoke a while ago. One time when I went there alone, I found a platform under the bridge where you could hop the fence and take cool pictures, but I didn’t go.

This time, we hopped the fence and noticed a shipping container on the right. I had the thought that we might be able to get on top… and there was a ladder!

So, we went up and I was really scared because it was higher than I expected and the dirty water is right underneath.

We did take some cool pictures though, so that was fun.

Blacker

Today, I got my moles removed with CO2 lasers. I imagine that getting a tattoo removed would probably feel about the same because I think they need to burn it off.

I’ve always had a lot of moles but I’ve definitely gained more in the last year because I didn’t wear sunscreen every day in Cali, a massive mistake.

So, if you are coming to the land of sunshine, then make sure to get sunscreen.

You need sunscreen not to protect from the sun, but to get out of the shade.

To me

On an unrelated note, I’ve been living for the plot for some time for the sake of being able to tell stories to others. However, I’ve realized that there are some things that sound good but completely go against what I value.

I imagined telling a story about a potential scenario, but realized that it sounded completely disgusting and that I would need to omit certain information.

Knishes

The thing about doing bad things is not that it’s addicting, but that it sticks onto you like gum. If you have one piece of gum on you, you’ll want to get it off. But if you’re already covered in it, you won’t really notice another piece.

And that’s how you become a gum monster.

Star Witness

There are no social rewards for calling yourself out, but you get to keep your integrity in exchange. No one will compliment you on your self-control, in fact, they will find it strange that you dared to imagine such things.

People are defined by desperation at their lowest and depravity at their highest. There’s really no way to know what you’ll do when you have the ability to do whatever you want.