Old Driver

“Night wraps the sky in tribute from the stars.

In hours like these, one rises to address

The ages, history, and all creation.” — Vladimir Mayakovsky

Driving and Music

I will be able to drive on my own in ten days, I put off getting my license for a long time because I wanted to focus on other things, but it is nice to finally be able to drive independently. My driving instructor is actually a very interesting person who introduced me to a R&B radio station on the 107.5 frequency. I knew some of the songs but I also heard a lot of new songs that weren’t actually new to my ears, just my memory.

For example, Fugees’s “Killing Me Softly With His Song” was already in my YouTube music playlist, but I didn’t really listen to it very much. However, I feel like listening to music on the radio while driving brings a big boost to the songs. Perhaps it is more effective for older songs because they generally are less hook-based in the beginning, and people are distracted from listening to music while driving.

My new friend A has not listened to a lot of Chinese songs, so I definitely recommended a lot of good ones. Recently, I have been listening to more Li Ronghao and Eason Chan than usual. I have not heard much Yorushika or Japanese songs because I have a playlist of only Chinese songs on Spotify, and I almost exclusively listen to that playlist. The reason is probably because my massive “iliekit” playlist of songs compiled over many years is full of songs that I no longer find nice-sounding.

Call me Ishmael

I started the first chapter of Moby Dick and it has been an interesting experience. Of course, this is after months of listening to DMO talk about the book without knowing the full plot. There are many quotes that I just want to memorize so that I can show them off. There are a lot of fun ones about water in the first chapter, but I remember looking up a quote about how a man will inevitably lead you to water.

DMO has basically spoiled the book for me, but that is only plot. Plot is not important in this book, but the themes and lessons are very important. Furthermore, analyzing the craftsmanship behind the book is also interesting. The Extracts chapter is full of quotes about whales from hundreds of different sources throughout history, and Melville wrote the book back in the day when there was no Google to help out with the quotes. He probably had to go through hundreds of books in the process. It’s funny because he writes that the quotes were compiled by a sub-sub librarian which is a bit of self-deprecating humor.

Old and New

I decided to end a relationship with a friend who consistently ignored me for months. I sometimes regret the choice but an imbalance of passion led to this outcome. Perhaps I should have done it sooner, like a year sooner, but a belief in the minute probability of improvements stopped me.

We often look back too much at the good times. I am reminded of an inspirational post I saw on Instagram a long time ago: “Whenever you feel like quitting, just remember why you started.” However, we must adapt to changes. There is no point in continuing something once it has deteriorated to a certain point. Even if communication is a solution, the real world requires our tired spirits to grope around in dark, muddy, and cold waters for those elusive catfish.

Of course, I was not owed any time, if they want to spend it elsewhere, fine. But, as for myself, I think it is best to cut my losses. In the end, I cannot say that I knew this friend because they actually haven’t told me much about themselves. Every one of my questions was met with a terse answer in the way that an elementary schooler would give without further elaboration.

They were a good person, just not the right person.

New

Part of the problem with a small university is that everyone knows everyone and it is hard to avoid people, like a stand user in JoJo’s. I made a new friend who is (probably) committing and it’s nice to meet someone who overestimates me like I do to them.

Anyway, my future math tutor is quite nice, like everyone I write about. I would not write about people I don’t like so there is a bit of survivorship bias. But I did learn about this nice song called 安九 which I’ve never heard. I like it quite a lot as a listening-song but not a singing-song because it’s quite repetitive.

(HI THERE! :DDDDD)

Probability

Speaking of statistics, my sister actually did a pretty hard math problem incredibly quickly. I doubted her math skills but I don’t think it was a fluke. It was essentially a P(A)/(P(A)+P(B)) problem but no one else knew how to do it. She hasn’t even learned probability and she knew how to do the problem.

Now, what is the problem? Well, her friend who is barely-ok at math (that means good) was doubting that my sister actually knew how to do the problem and said, “Are you sure you know how to do it and didn’t just guess?” I actually agreed with this comment, but I was also pissed off because I’m the only one who is allowed to insult my sister.

To borrow from a League streamer, it’s like… it’s like if your dog starts barking in the middle of the night, you don’t think much of it, but if your neighbor’s dog starts barking, then it’s time to take action.

A rare moment of sibling comradery has opened my eyes to the importance of respect.